Today is a difficult day.
New Year’s Eve, the last day of 2014.
The last day of Hugo’s year.
I know it is silly, time is irrelevant: the fact that a new year will start tomorrow is representative of how our culture measures time.
But it is not silly. It is how I feel. It is ok to feel however I feel, and today I feel sad and apprehensive.
Grief is not rational. I loved deeply, and I shall grieve deeply. I must remember that.
It illustrates my visceral need to be with my precious boy.
2014 is the year that Hugo lived. His dates have ‘2014’ on them.
He was born on February 20, 2014.
He died on March 27, 2014.
Hugo will not in 2015. Not physically.
I have seen parts of this poem before, but today is the first time I read it whole.
The words have deep resonance for me, not just the mention of stars and moons, though of course they hold great symbolic significance for Hugo for me, but it reminds me that Hugo is always with me.
It does not matter what date is displayed on the calendar. Nothing has changed.
Hugo is a part of me. He goes everywhere I go. He inspires what I do.
I carry Hugo’s heart. I carry it in my heart.
I love you, Hugo xxxx